Insecurity, Wrong decision

Have you ever wondered why you have made your decision that way, and considering all odds, you have to make it anyway? I have been wondering all year why did I care so much about some of the decisions that I have made, considering the factors that I may have hurt them, and make them feel bad. When you were in a state of insecurity, unsatisfied with something and plus, you never think that you have done wrong, you made your decision anyway...blurring by all THESE factors. So, does it make the final decision as FINAL? Is it considered as a WISE one?

I have made my choices and decision long, long time ago... and I never regret

this one - - being with my only love, Daniel. But, the problem is not here. I have made my decision that I will not be as who I was before (just like what I have mentioned in the previous entry)
anymore. I am going to be a new person and GO TO HELL with those who HATES ME, DISAPPROVING of me, and what ever they want to say to anyone about me. IGNORANCE IS A BLISS. And hey, I am hurt too, and nobody cares? Some people just like to see others suffer... and to condemn people just to see that they have influence and such... "Hey, I am stronger now. I know you support me... what have I told you?" DAMN. It feels so good using those words... and without realizing the fact that we have been influencing people in an EVIL way, we actually got dragged up with more USELESS effort of trying to gain everybody's support!

I couldn't believe what I have read on my chat screen just now when one of my friends actually tole me that the LADY that I used to be friend with, BFF with, close with, actually SELLING STORIES bout me. So, it began with me being angry with those people, particularly her? WHATEVER...and she began to tell this friend NASTY stories bout me that she doesn't even want to say anything more about it. It was just ONE argument (or, maybe I was too harsh?) that the LADY actually have GUTS to say something like that to ANOTHER friend? OK. SO, is the conclusion like this - - you cannot be angry to your friends because they are your BFF, and it is IMPORTANT not to HURT them??--- For me, the definition of friendship is this >>>>>> Friends ARE shoulder to cry on, for good times and bad times...(matter of-factly) and, for me, as a friend it is also IMPORTANT to show them that they DO wrong, that we ARE HURT for what they have done, and being angry is just a tiny part of it, to show that we CARE, to let THEM understand that we too, NEED ASSURANCE from them...as a friend. Uughh... so, anyone wants to back out now, and NO MORE being a FRIEND to me?

OK.OK. Am I sound too serious?? LOL... Anyways, I am glad that I have more friends that I can rely on, despite all this hurtful feelings... I am glad also that I have made my decision to let SOME PEOPLE go, because they are just NOT for me... and I always remember this quote, " Just let those people in your past, past...there are reasons why they don't make it to your future". So, I believe there are truths in this statement, and AM letting IT GO...my PAST.

My future is what I am concern about now. I APPRECIATE those who appreciates me...and if you don't, I have nothing to say, period.

What did I say about INSECURITY and WRONG DECISION? The feeling of insecurity will sure AFFECTS your decision. When you feel that you are insecure, that you will lose, you will fall, you WILL make the decision, without actually knowing what you have done. Let me say, SELF-CENTERED. I am now struggling with myself, trying very best to THINK IT ALL OVER AGAIN after I have made my mind. I felt it was wrong, but I soon see the rationale of these things that happen around me now.

So, FORGET ABOUT those jerks that have been hurting you, saying things bout you... THEY are not WORTH it...

Thinking positive..... the pictures below are meaningful

So, for you guys out there, don't do ridiculous things to your friends... they are hard to find... but, then, it is up to you to CHOOSE. Your INSECURITY is not for WRONG DECISION, but for pre-CAUTION and a REMINDER for you of the EVIL ONES. Life is the way it is. HARD and BEAUTIFUL at the same time. Choose wisely, don't be blurred by FAKE IMAGES of your friends. They are behaving as what you want to see, just look at the other side of it, before it is getting CRAZIER and HURTFUL.

Thanks for those who are always around me, give me SUPPORT and TRUST me. I would never make you feel down cause I know you are always here with me. LOVE is all I need, FAITH and TRUST is all I live for.