HAPPY NEW YEAR 2010!!! HO!HO!HO! Well2... how was the celebration for the new year? Well, mine was simple as I just spent my New Year at home..as usual... SO...what is the meaning of this year to you guys?? It is the year of the TIGER!!! RROOOAARRR.... uhuhuu...sounds scary, isn't it? hmm...I can't recall if I have friends born in the tiger year...
Goodbye 2009, WELCOME 2010.
OK. The entry for today, in conjunction with New Year's Day is about the new start. I have been through a lot of things and series of events last year... and, last year was a very, very tough year for me and it had caused me a lot of pain that I need to bear until now. As you all had realized, my entries last year touched on a lot of issues about friendship, love, betrayal and forgiveness... This year, I hope it will be better than what I have shared.
I have been through sadness and happiness at the same time, I bet all of you do...mmm... We hope a lot of things every minute of our lives to make it better and with no regrets. However, I believe that we do REGRET at things that we have done and that is what FORGIVENESS is for, right? Year 2009 had taught me a lot of things in this world and make me understand how lucky I am and how I should be more careful next time, also to be more grateful and thankful that I still live in this world.
Being a 21 year-old in the year 2009 is not as a BLAST as it should be. I had hurt people around me, and I am hurt too... for what I did. Yeah...serve me right for all those things happen around me...cause, it is my fault...I admit it... and I am sorry... Some people just too ego to accept my apology or maybe, I am not to be forgiven... what am I to do when I am not forgiven?I do not want to make things worst and I will stay as who I am... NOW.
That is just part of the story. I have made huge mistake in my love life and I need not to mention what... and I know, I am not to be forgiven by him... But, he is too good to me that he had given me chances to rebuild and to begin a new life. I want a fresh start as I cannot bear the feelings of sadness and losing him after 9 years of relationship...FUH! Love him so much...
As I have been through
all the pain in the ass of some people, I really, really need this year to be more meaningful and I want to start fresh everything... this seriously involve RELATIONSHIP...huhu... I have been feeling sad and I did cry over some matters that out of my control. I have no guts to be as brave as I was before, and I think for now, it is good to let some of the "things" or people go. I can't believe I actually did what I did and I have no reason or whatsoever to regret it. Maybe it is my fault, or it is not, but what happens, happens...so I can't do anything - NO MORE.
In the year 2009 makes me really think who I am, and what I value most in life. I have learned a lot of things that make me feel regret, hate and stupid. Most of the time I do feel that I am such a pain in the ass to some people and it is best for me to keep quiet. However, it seems like it is not the best thing to do when I really lose people in my life. Some people are just ignorant, and they might hate you because you are you and pretend to like you because you have things that they don't. How is that?How should you tolerate this kind of thing or people??? In matter of fact, I think they are the one that are pain in the ass because they are just THEM!
I can't take away my words, my actions and my ways of doing things last year...ugghhh... it is now 2nd of January 2010...hmm..so, what I can say about starting things new is that I HOPE, REALLY HOPE that this year will be MUCH, MUCH better than last year.... because it had caused me so much tears and pain... and I desire to make amends. I do not want to feel hate...I only want LOVE...lots and lots of LOVE... let it take away the sadness and make me happy instead, can??
I am so disappointed with myself in the previous year because of what I have done... it affects my result and so do my friendship. I have no idea what has gone wrong (but there must be something wrong) and I REALLY HOPE for the BETTERMENT of future this year.
I could say that in the year 2010, I have a long lists of to-do list and wish-list..need not to mention what, cause I know I will not stop...haha...
So, in my entry as an introduction this year:
1. Start New - Repair the damage, mends the broken (if possible...)
2. Don't worry, be happy.
3. No more PROBLEMS... (get the heck out of my life!)
4. Positively view this life as what it is.
5. Do not THINK TOO MUCH. (It is an illness, you know)
The 5 things listed above are what I want and need for this year, 2010... it has been a decade since millennium and I do need COURAGE and GOOD THINGS come in my way. I know HE is with me...HE who always guide me and sees me... HE is GOD.
Thought for the day:: We are never alone as we face this life that full of torns and challenges, God is always with us, no matter what... Let those people hurt when you never fail to love. Because love is such a wonderful word, strong and never fades.
Fellas, adios for now, and will continue again some other time later... HAVE A BLESSED NEW YEAR 2010... and be good... MORE LOVE, y'all.!!
As I have been through
all the pain in the ass of some people, I really, really need this year to be more meaningful and I want to start fresh everything... this seriously involve RELATIONSHIP...huhu... I have been feeling sad and I did cry over some matters that out of my control. I have no guts to be as brave as I was before, and I think for now, it is good to let some of the "things" or people go. I can't believe I actually did what I did and I have no reason or whatsoever to regret it. Maybe it is my fault, or it is not, but what happens, happens...so I can't do anything - NO MORE.
In the year 2009 makes me really think who I am, and what I value most in life. I have learned a lot of things that make me feel regret, hate and stupid. Most of the time I do feel that I am such a pain in the ass to some people and it is best for me to keep quiet. However, it seems like it is not the best thing to do when I really lose people in my life. Some people are just ignorant, and they might hate you because you are you and pretend to like you because you have things that they don't. How is that?How should you tolerate this kind of thing or people??? In matter of fact, I think they are the one that are pain in the ass because they are just THEM!
I can't take away my words, my actions and my ways of doing things last year...ugghhh... it is now 2nd of January 2010...hmm..so, what I can say about starting things new is that I HOPE, REALLY HOPE that this year will be MUCH, MUCH better than last year.... because it had caused me so much tears and pain... and I desire to make amends. I do not want to feel hate...I only want LOVE...lots and lots of LOVE... let it take away the sadness and make me happy instead, can??
I am so disappointed with myself in the previous year because of what I have done... it affects my result and so do my friendship. I have no idea what has gone wrong (but there must be something wrong) and I REALLY HOPE for the BETTERMENT of future this year.
I could say that in the year 2010, I have a long lists of to-do list and wish-list..need not to mention what, cause I know I will not stop...haha...
So, in my entry as an introduction this year:
1. Start New - Repair the damage, mends the broken (if possible...)
2. Don't worry, be happy.
3. No more PROBLEMS... (get the heck out of my life!)
4. Positively view this life as what it is.
5. Do not THINK TOO MUCH. (It is an illness, you know)
The 5 things listed above are what I want and need for this year, 2010... it has been a decade since millennium and I do need COURAGE and GOOD THINGS come in my way. I know HE is with me...HE who always guide me and sees me... HE is GOD.
Thought for the day:: We are never alone as we face this life that full of torns and challenges, God is always with us, no matter what... Let those people hurt when you never fail to love. Because love is such a wonderful word, strong and never fades.
Fellas, adios for now, and will continue again some other time later... HAVE A BLESSED NEW YEAR 2010... and be good... MORE LOVE, y'all.!!
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